Blame Abba

She picked up her own bag and went down the hall so I followed. She opened the front door. I froze.

"What's wrong?" asked Jacqui.

I couldn't believe she didn't know. But she didn't. And then she did.

"Don, I've just realised. You've never been out dressed. Have you? You've done this all on your own, just for yourself. Totally private, 'in the closet' as they say. Nobody has ever seen you like this. Have they?"

I was very hesitant. I had fantasised about being out, about being seen and treated as a woman, acknowledged as female, called 'Mrs.' or 'Miss'. But I had never dared do anything about it. Jacqui knew, at least now she did, she smiled very sympathetically.

"No, never."

"OK Don. I am sorry, I did not know. I mean, I didn't think you had, you know, well, gone very far but I did assume you had at least been out of the front door. You really could, you know. In fact you should, and you shall. We are going for a drive. Now. Nothing major, just maybe to a supermarket or somewhere. Don't worry, nobody will know. I promise you. You will not be looked at, I am sure, unless of course someone fancies you. You really do make a very attractive woman, you know."

I wasn't sure. Not sure at all. Did I want to? Hell, OF COURSE I did. I was just scared. But although Jacqui realised that, she also seemed to be sure I could get away with it. I realised she had 'faith' in me - around the town, in a shop or wherever, she would not want to be seen hanging round with somebody weird-looking. Therefore I didn't look weird. I MUST look female. In a way I had difficulty realising it, that though I had always pretended to myself that I looked the part, I REALLY did!

Before I could really think any more, get more scared, back out or whatever, Jacqui had urged me through the front door and shut it behind me. There was no way out now, I realised. I had my handbag, but I didn't have my keys, I had left them on the dresser when I changed. I had my lipstick of course, my cigarettes, my mascara, but not my keys.